The Theory of Weedativity

UntitledSo you may read the title and think to yourself, “Weedativity? That can’t be real.” NO SHIT. It’s about it be. Let’s start with the theory we’re mocking; the theory of relativity. The theory is that the world and universe is 4-dimensional. This means that the world we inhabit, earth (dumbass), and space, are 3-dimensional. Then there is “Spacetime”, in which there is no distinction between the two. So how does Weedativity link to this? Ever been so high that time doesn’t really work right? How about you feel light headed and almost a sensation of floating? Welcome to the 4th dimension bitches. The theory of weedativity proposes that our minds and thoughts are controlled by a common wave of energy (3rd dimension), such as normal life. As weedativity starts to increase, possibly from rippin’ that bong, or maybe sipping on a vape for a little, the 4th dimension becomes more apparent in normal life. As we all know, it usually does’t take much of a solid bud to knock ya on your ass, so maybe the 4th dimension really isn’t as far as we think…

Ok, so we now we know that this theory is easy to apply to real life circumstances. If one were to try and test this theory here’s how to experiment:

Materials Needed

1. Favorite arsenal weapon (bong, bowl, vape, some ghetto rig you made in your basement, etc.)

2. About 1g Marijuana of your choice (per person)

3. Badass lighter (or hemp wick if you’re feelin healthy) and grinder (5 piece preferably)

4. Any other safety precautions necessary for secure testing (sploof, towel to block door, you know what i’m talking about (dorm kids)).


1. Grind up marijuana in grinder. If more keif is desired, proceed to place nickel in first keif chamber and shake gently for 10 seconds.

2. Pack the bowl of the desired piece to that bitches brim.

3. To speed up process, add 1 part large keif (commonly known as shake), and 1 part pure keif.

4. Ignite the marijuana and take it in deep son (no homo)

5. Repeat as necessary


My advice, get the subject (most likely yourself ya lucky son of a bitch) somewhere safe because they’re goin’ down any minute. If pure Weedativity is accomplished, the subject will have no perception of time and space, and thoughts will race…genius thoughts. Eventually, the subject will tire and either request more (always say yes), or quietly pass the FUCK OUT.


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